THE JOURNAL
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The 2008 journal entries will be found at www.pinkribbonmiracle.com/2008.html
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Monday December 31, 2007
Another year is gone. As children, we were told that time passes faster as you age. We never believed it, but oh how
true it really is--as I sit here now forty-four years old.
Looking back at the year, I have to acknowledge that 2007 was the most difficult year I've experienced. It surpassed the
year of chemo. During that year, I had a plan. I was on a mission. I saw a beginning and an end--and I dug my heels in and fought
for my life and that of my unborn child.
In the years since, I have been blindsided by illness, surgeries, recurrence possibilities, and everything else I hadn't
"planned for". For the first few years, I was determined to overcome it all. I believed if I pushed myself enough, I would be
back and better than ever. Over time, I realized this was not to be.
What made this year the most challenging? I think it was the sheer number of illnesses and infections. The number of problems
that went without answers. I spent almost the entire year on antibiotics. It wore my body down...and each time I seemed to
sink lower physically. My calendar was full of doctor's appointments, tests, and medicine changes. I remember the nerve conduction
studies, mris, and ekgs. I remember the ct scans, the ivps, the numerous blood tests. I remember the call I took
in WalMart's parking lot...when I was told there was a mass on my adrenal gland. I remember the neuropathy I began to experience,
and the problems I had with my left elbow, neck, and shoulder blades. I remember the months of physical therapy. I remember the
times my stomach hurt so bad that I counted down the hours until I could just go to bed, and wish another day away. I remember
the bladder cancer test that came back positive (as I still await my final test result or possible diagnosis). I remember having
two surgeries in two months, and as I write this I am still trying to recover from the toll they have taken on my body.
Do you know what else I can say about 2007? It was also the year that I have learned much, conquered much, trusted God more.
It has been my most fulfilling year in ways perhaps few are aware of. I have learned more about who I am. Who I can be. What
counts. And what isn't worth the time. And for the work I've done, I can say I am proud.
In 2007, God has continued to show me mercy. To date, I have lost count of the number of times I have been "rescued" from
what seemed to be cancer recurrence or relapse. The mass on the adrenal gland? Gone. The bladder cancer diagnosis? With a 95%
accuracy rate, I tested positive. In surgery, however, random biopsies were proven benign. In three weeks, I will be tested
again. I'm a winner either way....if negative, praise be to God. If positive, praise God for infections that prompted testing
for the earliest detection possible. And the tonsillectomy that was supposed to be brutal? It was difficult, but I never
truly suffered from throat pain.
Perhaps one of God's greatest gifts to me as a result of my illness-- in 2007 I continued to see the beauty around me. I took
just a little longer to watch the leaves blow. Just a little longer to pause and feel the breeze on my face. A little longer
to study the flowers that bloomed outside, the color of my children's eyes, the feel of Frank's hand, the sound of my cats
as they purr. A little longer to study the bark before I placed another log on the fire...and a little longer to appreciate
that I am still alive.
I look toward 2008 with optimism, gratitude, faith and love.
Today I am grateful for laugh filled telephone rants, and the lighthearted feeling that follows.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thank you God, for another year.
Sunday December 30, 2007
Hannah-ism: I was changing Hannah's earrings for her this morning. The left one is sometimes a little
sore, so I did it first. It hurt her a little, then the right earring went in with no problem. She stood up, smiling.
Hannah: "That was a piece of cake."
(brief pause)
Hannah: "But that first one was just half a piece!!"
Today I am grateful for rain.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday December 29, 2007
"The great man is he who does not lose his childlike heart."
Today I am grateful for spiderman ziplines.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday December 28, 2007
Update: I'm just over two weeks post op. Just by looking, my throat appears to be almost completely healed. It does hurt
if I yawn, and my sense of taste is not totally restored. If I speak for long or try to raise my voice, I can feel a bit of
strain. The earaches are mostly gone, and I am no longer running a fever. My stomach is slowly starting to heal, and I have
returned to about 95% of my normal eating habits.
I'm optimistically looking forward to improved health as a result of this surgery.
Today I am grateful for maintaining my allergy shot schedule.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday December 27, 2007
The girls hit "stimulation overload" today. After non-stop playing with things electronic, action-related, artsy,
and crafty, today they stayed in pajamas and watched dvds.
Today I am grateful for a full wood carrier.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday December 26, 2007
"Personal development is your springboard to personal excellence. Ongoing, continuous, non-stop personal development
literally assures you that there is no limit to what you can accomplish."
Today I am grateful for hanging out at Mom's house.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday December 25, 2007
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!
Abigail was up early and Hannah soon followed. Squeals of delight were echoing through the house. Those smiles
and "This is the best Christmas ever!" exclamations make me happy to be a parent.
"Remember, if Christ isn't found in your heart, you won't find it under the tree."
Today I am grateful for the birth of Christ, and eternal salvation.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday December 24, 2007
After a wonderful evening spent at my parent's house with my siblings, niece and nephew, we returned home in time for
the girls to put out reindeer food, and then milk and cookies for Santa. We sat together for family devotion, and to discuss
the most important part of Christmas...the celebration of the birth of Christ.
Surprisingly, the girls were fast asleep by nine o'clock.
Today I am grateful for Dad's creativity and vacation "tips".
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday December 23, 2007
"The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a happy family all wrapped up in each other."
Today I am grateful for family laughter and shared memories.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday December 22, 2007
To my delight, the girls slept past normal "school wake up" time. It was quiet in the house and I decided to pause and enjoy.
Rather than get up and deal with "to do" for the day, I sat up and spent some time looking out the windows. From my bed, I
have a beautiful view of a finely aged tree, and beyond that a field and mountainside. I watched as a bird flew by, and then
noticed the animals in the field, eagerly running for their morning meal. Nature is such a beautiful gift from God, and it
really thrills my heart to study it in detail.
I heard some movement and called out--Abigail came in all smiles. She was carrying a little New Testament to read her devotion
for our youth program. I told her to come on in bed with me. Cozy under the duvet, she snuggled close, and started chatting non-stop.
As she spoke, I saw my baby girl, now nine years old. I stroked her hair and touched her face, bringing many memories to mind.
Time passes so quickly. How proud I am of her....
Hannah awoke and walked in. "Come join us" I said, and she jumped in the middle. By now Abigail was ready to get up.
Hannah-ism:
Hannah: "I was just in my bed holding the bear on my face to get warm."
Me: "Are you cold, honey?"
Hannah: "Yeah."
Me: "Come here and snuggle, I'll get you warm."
She eagerly moved close and I wrapped my arms around her.
Hannah: "Woo! You're hot as a pot!"
We laughed and then she asked me if I was going to eat waffles. I told her I probably shouldn't eat them yet, but would
eat a bagel. "I'm going to fix you breakfast in bed, Mommy!" Abigail heard her and said "Me, too!" I agreed that we could all
eat in bed, as long as we left no crumbs on Daddy's side. Hannah proudly busied herself cooking bagels in the toaster oven.
Hannah-ism: She carefully served our breakfast on Christmas plates and climbed in bed.
Hannah: "I gave you a bagel but I couldn't give you gold, frankenstein, and myrrh!"
Today I am grateful for peaceful mornings.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday December 21, 2007
"Sometimes when we are generous in small, barely detectable ways it can change someone else's life forever."
Today I am grateful for answered phone calls.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday December 20, 2007
A setback. After eight days, my stomach hit its tolerance for meds and foods I am unaccustomed to eating. The last 24 hours
have felt longer than the eight days of surgery recovery. It will pass, and I have no choice but to ride it out.
Today I am grateful for Christmas crafts.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday December 19, 2007
Post-op: eight days down. My follow-up was today, and Dr. Jabourian said I had done very well, much better
than he anticipated. My scabs have already formed and dropped. The ear pain should diminish in the next couple of days.
I am still at a bleeding risk, so my activity continues to be limited. I have one more day left of the antibiotics. I do still
have a sore throat, of course, and have not fully returned to a regular diet.
Based on the horror stories I was told, I would say this surgery was a difficult one, but NOT like I was told. At no point
did I want to cry or die, LOL.
And remember the Dec. 3 entry?
Note to Google: Don't do that to me the next time I ask you a reasonable question.
Today I am grateful for being closer to the end than the beginning.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday December 18, 2007
Tomorrow I go back to the doctor, to check the progress of my recovery. It's been a week since surgery, and I've been
home bound the entire time.
Post-op: seven days down. "Less" to go.
It's All Abigail: Frank and I were standing in the kitchen and he was hugging me. Usually the girls fly in,
to make a "family hug".
Abigail: "Ooh, I think I see a place I can get in!"
Me: (whispering to Frank) "Shh, don't move, let's see what she does."
Abigail: "I'm getting in here!"
(still no reply from us)
Abigail: "This must be a romantic moment, I'll leave you alone for a little while."
We ALL busted out laughing!!
Today I am grateful for soft boiled eggs.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday December 17, 2007
I guess this is hump day. I had to go back to taking the pain meds every four hours. Same type pain as yesterday, but more in
the ears as well. The medication does control the pain pretty well, and I can't complain.
I am glad I had this surgery and have no regrets. The process has not been anything like I expected, or was told.
Hannah-ism: Frank and I were sitting on the couch talking. Our voices were lowered, because we were discussing
Christmas details. Hannah didn't know the topic of conversation, only that our tones were hushed when she walked in.
Hannah: "Oh, I guess you and Daddy are in private talks."
Me: "Private talks?"
Hannah: "Yeah, that's what me and Andrew do at recess. We sit alone and talk about our apartment and stuff."
Post-op: six days down. "Can't be many" to go.
Today I am grateful for a morning nap under the duvet.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday December 16, 2007
Today my pain seems a bit different. My teeth are sore and I feel more of a muscular ache. I must be clenching my teeth at
night, unknown to me, while I sleep. It could be a subconscious reaction to pain. My throat appears to be
healing okay, but there are times I can't open my mouth enough to speak clearly. The ear pain continues, but not as severe.
I'm managing my liquid/soft food intake, and have lost no weight post surgery as of this morning.
Post-op: five days down. ? to go.
Today I am grateful for a beautiful snowfall today.
Thank you God, for another day.
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Saturday December 15, 2007
Around 5am, I awoke with a painful ear ache. It had also been almost seven hours since I had taken pain medication.
I got up and took the meds and slowly the pain eased to a dull ache. I had been told that I could experience ear pain
as I started to heal, so it didn't come as a big surprise.
I definitely have to limit the amount of conversation I have, but I am taking in liquids steadily. Twice today I enjoyed
a bowl of noodle soup.
Post-op: four days down. ? to go.
Still waiting for that "day (blank) is the worst day of all" that I have been warned about. I'm beginning to wonder if it's actually coming.
Today I am grateful for feeling anxiety free ten days before Christmas.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday December 14, 2007
What I learned today:
1. Talking too much to your children can make your throat hurt.
2. Breyer's lactose free vanilla ice cream, if eaten slowly in small amounts, is quite tasty.
3. Yogurt whips go down so easy, I think Frank needs to buy some more. The two I had are gone.
4. Campbell's Noodle soup in the package tastes much better than canned chicken noodle soup.
Post-op: three days down. ? to go.
Today I am grateful for finding foods that don't upset my stomach.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday December 13, 2007
I rested better last night, sleeping as much as an hour or more at a time. I did take pain meds once in the night.
I have had minimal nausea today (without using the phenergan gel). I ate almost a full can of chicken noodle soup, including
the noodles, over the course of two meals. I was also able to eat a yogurt whip, Ensure, gatorade, and my favorite mcvities (soaked
well in tea so they would be very soft).
I took one nap today in the afternoon, and watched tv most of the day. I did take the pain meds at six hour intervals today.
Although this is no walk in the park, I feel like I am doing quite well. I do have some minimal ear pain and can't quite knock
the headache.
So now I wonder about the "worst time is 4-5 days post-op". Time will tell, but I realize I am not out of the woods quite yet.
Post-op: two days down. ? to go.
Today I am grateful for Jill's virtual popsicles.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday December 12, 2007
Last night we ran the humidifier by the bed, and I had water on the nightstand. A couple times I slept for 45 minutes, and most
of the rest of the night I slept in seven to ten minute increments. That's actually a good thing in my mind, because I was able to
keep my throat moist. I could tell when the pain meds were approaching four hours, because my headache would worsen and my throat
would get a bit more sore. I took it at four hour intervals throughout the night, from 7:30pm til morning.
Since we weren't home until late, Frank decided to take today off, not knowing for sure how I would fare. I felt more comfortable
having him here with me. He's always my "best medicine". I drank some Ensure, tried some chicken broth, gatorade pops, and
jello. By afternoon I was extremely nauseous. That was much worse than the throat pain. Frank called the nurse.
Shortly after, Dr. Jabourian called me. He was surprised that my level of throat pain wasn't as high as he anticipated, and
gladly called in phenergan gel for me.
By bedtime, I've stretched the pain meds to five-six hours instead of four and the nausea has lessened. My throat is swollen
and at times it is difficult to breathe, but overall I'm doing better than I anticipated.
Post-op: one day down. ? to go.
Today I am grateful for a husband who takes great care of me.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday December 11, 2007
I had to be at the hospital at 11am, and was expected in surgery by noon. There was some sort of emergency, and I wasn't taken
down until 12:40, and laid in the OR holding room until about 1:15. I heard discussions of canceled surgeries and who was left.
I prayed they weren't going to come tell me I would have to reschedule. Soon Dr. Jabourian came by and I knew it was a go.
They did the usual meds, and just as I was drifting off I realized they were putting a bp cuff on my left arm. I had a band
that said "no sticks or bp" but it was overlooked. I vaguely remember asking if that was a bp cuff they just used and telling them
"get it off, get it off". It wasn't on long enough for my arm to go numb, and they moved it to the other side. As usual, the next thing
I remember was waking up in recovery.
My throat did hurt, and it was difficult to swallow. What bothered me more was my neck and back. (I really don't want to give much
thought into what position I was in for this surgery) I also had a major headache, and stomach upset.
It wasn't long before I was brought back upstairs, where I started eating ice chips and trying to drink the protein water
we had brought with us. Carbonated drinks are something I can't tolerate, so I wanted to be prepared with my own liquids.
I still had IV fluids, but at 6pm, they unhooked everything and I was released. I have two prescriptions--an antibiotic, and a
liquid pain medication (lortab). I will take it every four hours as prescribed, rather than wait until it's too late to
control pain levels.
It's 7:30pm, and I'm headed to bed for the night. My throat hurts, but the pain at the moment is not at the levels I expected.
Today I am grateful for another surgery behind me.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday December 10, 2007
At last the time has come. Tomorrow is surgery day. At this point, I just want to get it done and move on.
The last few days have been long. I have been battling sinus issues, sore throat and a low-grade fever. In addition,
I'm in the middle of a pretty bad fibromyalgia flare up. The upside of this is that because I feel pretty lousy, it makes
me really look forward to the benefits of having this surgery behind me.
I am now scheduled for the sixth surgery tomorrow. Five children are ahead of me, and I don't have to be there until 11am.
Surgery should take place at noon, if all goes as planned. I don't expect to be home until late.
I really don't know how long I will be offline. My focus will be to heal, follow the doctors orders, and try to keep my nutrition
in check. I will post updates as soon as I am able.
By tonight I'm feeling calm and ready. I ask that you pray there are no complications, and the recovery go well.
Thank you for the emails and words of concern and caring.
Dean, thanks for your phone calls. I feel loved when you call me "sissy". It means more than you know.
Hannah-ism: Hannah was leading the way up the steps after school, and was first in the door. With that toothless
smile, she wrapped her arms around my waist.
Hannah: "Hey there, surgery girl!"
Today I am grateful for inner peace.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday December 9, 2007
From Abigail, an angel.
Today I am grateful for the girls' "stuffed animal" tree.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday December 8, 2007
Special thanks for this award to my long time friend Penny.
You make me smile.
Today I am grateful for a small hand rubbing my forehead, without prompting.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday December 7, 2007
I went for my pre-op testing today and am now cleared for surgery on Tuesday. I'm ready to get going with it.
THANK YOU Cindy for the idea of gatorade pops! I can water the gatorade down some and be able to tolerate that.
Today I am grateful for afternoon rain and a hooded jacket.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday December 6, 2007
I just heard a more subtle musical version of this song and it was fabulous.
All the colors of the rainbow
All of voices of the wind
Every dream that reaches out
That reaches out to find where love begins
Every word of every story
Every star in every sky
Every corner of creation lives to testify
For as long as I shall live
I will testify to love
I'll be a witness in the silences when words are not enough
With every breath I take I will give thanks to God above
For as long as I shall live
I will testify to love
From the mountains to the valleys
From the rivers to the sea
Every hand that reaches out
Every hand that reaches out to offer peace
Every simple act of mercy
Every step to kingdom come
All the Hope in every heart will speak what love has done
Today I am grateful for a warm fleece top.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday December 5, 2007
Because of the stomach issues I have, I need to prepare my body for surgery. I want to introduce some liquids and nutritional
supplements slowly in order to be able to tolerate them. I cannot eat ice cream and popsicles.
What have I learned so far?
1. Chocolate probably masks flavor better than any other, but I haven't had anything chocolate in fourteen years.
2. Strawberry Ensure is nasty.
3. Strawberry Ensure over crushed ice, if sipped slowly, is tolerable.
Today I am grateful for the surprise of a "free" day.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday December 4, 2007
"Challenge everything you do. Expand your thinking. Refocus your efforts. Rededicate yourself to your future."
Today I am grateful for ladies group fellowship.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday December 3, 2007
Last Tuesday I was finally pronounced "infection free". On Thursday I had a sore throat, ear pain, and a cough.
I hoped it was just a cold, but rather than get better, various places appeared in my throat again.
Today I went back to Dr. Jabourian. The good news? I don't have another case of strep. The not so good news? I have a problem with one
tonsil and ongoing infection. I will deal with it the rest of my life if I don't have my tonsils removed. There's only one
right answer here, and I know it. I will have a tonsillectomy next Tuesday.
I am shocked at how many people have told me adults have a very hard time with this particular surgery. Nurses tell me.
Even the doctor said it would be brutal for seven to ten days. I've had a lot of surgery and it seems strange that this would
be so difficult to get through. Thinking there are plenty of stories about adults who didn't fair so poorly, I decided to
Google "adult tonsillectomy pain wasnt bad".
THIS is what Google had to say in
response. I can do nothing but laugh.
Today I am grateful for six weeks antibiotic free.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday December 2, 2007
Guess who is in town?
Today I am grateful for a light rain.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday December 1, 2007
A very special message to a very special person...
"I love smurf underoos."
Today I am grateful for lichen on tree bark.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday November 30, 2007
Hannah-ism: As we walked through the living room, we saw a news story featuring deer.
Hannah: "I'd like to kiss a deer."
Me: "Would you?"
Hannah: (after a long pause) "As long as it wouldn't eat my lips off!"
Today I am grateful for cartoon images.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday November 29, 2007
Happy 45th Anniversary, Mom & Dad !
Today I am grateful for parents whose love grows every day.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday November 28, 2007
This makes my heart sing.
"All I want for Christmas is my..."
Hannah has a surprise.
Today I am grateful for the sound of wind blowing.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday November 27, 2007
The test results are back. After thirteen months of various infections, and twelve antibiotics--I have been antibiotic free
for almost five weeks and there appears to be no infection in my body. At last.
Today I am grateful for results I've waited a long time to hear.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday November 26, 2007
"Spiritual values transcend the material artifacts that we can touch and see. They take us
into the realm of beauty, inspiration and love."
Today I am grateful for the sound of heavy rain.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday November 25, 2007
Who's happier?
The uniters or the dividers?
The builders or the breakers?
The givers or the takers?
I think you know the answer.
There's a whole world out there that needs you.
Down the street, or across the ocean...
Give.
Today I am grateful for a surprise Christmas gift.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday November 24, 2007
On the evening before Thanksgiving, my Dad ("Poppy" to my girls) called the girls up to his office, and said they
were going on an expedition, and maybe some turkey hunting. Later, Frank and I were called to Mom's house to wait.
In they came, with their own turkeys!
Abigail's turkey
Hannah's turkey
Hand made by Hannah
We love Poppy!
Today I am grateful for living right beside my parents.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday November 23, 2007
"Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones."
Today I am grateful for a wonderful, fantasy filled movie.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday November 22, 2007
Happy Thanksgiving---a day for reflection, family, and so much more.
Hannah-ism: We gathered at the table for breakfast this morning, and held hands to say grace. Before the
prayer, I wanted to say something about the holiday.
Me: "It's Thanksgiving, let's all name something we are thankful for. Daddy, what's one thing you are thankful for?"
Frank: "I'm thankful for this family."
Me: "Ok, Hannah, what are you thankful for?"
Hannah: "I'm thankful that God let Jesus die on the cross so we can go to heaven."
I don't think I can top that one.
Today I am grateful for two daughters who keep Jesus close in mind.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday November 21, 2007
It's All Abigail:
I wondered when the question would come. Abigail is now nine years old. Today was the day.
Abigail: "Mommy, is Santa real?"
Me: "Santa? Why would you say that?"
Abigail: "Some people say he isn't real."
Me: "Who told you that?"
Abigail: "A lot of people in my class. They said Santa isn't real, it's really your parents."
Me: "I think I want to believe in Santa Claus."
Abigail: "Me too. Besides, with all those presents, it couldn't be your parents, it would cost too much money!!"
Me: "Good point."
She walked away smiling, as I thought to myself..."Hold on to the magic as long as you can, baby girl."
Today I am grateful for holiday excitement.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday November 20, 2007
I once had a a pillow that said "Dogs are children in fur coats."
Today is for Snoop...the companion animal who never slept until "mommy" closed her eyes and was
safely asleep.
Today I am grateful for animal lovers.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday November 19, 2007
Happy 20th Anniversary, "Big Daddy Dirt Pile"!
I love you.
Today I am grateful that I can keep my tonsils....for now, anyway.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday November 18, 2007
Tomorrow I have two doctor appointments. One is with my urologist for the first monthly follow-up. Ideally, I will be
one month infection free. This will mark an entire month without antibiotics in over a year. If so, I don't have to go for
the next check until mid-December. (January is the repeat FISH test to get a definitive "all clear" or the bladder cancer
diagnosis. It's protocol to wait three months before repeating the test once it comes back positive.) I will also see Dr.
Jabourian--the ENT (ear, nose, throat) specialist that has treated my brother Dean extensively and who removed Abigail's
tonsils and adenoids this summer. Within the last few months I have a recurring place in my throat. It always comes in the
exact same place, and two times previous it has been swabbed at the gp and came back negative for strep. Since it has come
up again and appears to be a pattern now, it's time to see what is happening. The urologist has already expressed concern
that I still have my tonsils. I will not be surprised if I am told tomorrow that it's my turn to go under the knife.
Primarily I need to find out what sort of infection continues to make itself known, and what we can do about it.
Today I am grateful for an impromptu fashion show.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday November 17, 2007
"Put your heart, mind, intellect, and soul even to your smallest acts. This is the secret of success."
Today I am grateful for my friend, "supermom".
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday November 16, 2007
Her bladder cancer is back. The one I call my "other" Mom. The tumors were removed last time, and today was the
three month follow up scope. We prayed she would be all clear, but there are additional tumors. This time she will
have surgery and then take treatment by filling the bladder with a chemical for two hours, once a week, for six weeks.
This news is not what we wanted, but it is the reality of the situation. I can only pray that the treatments go well, and
the medicine will kill all of the cancer cells, so she doesn't face another recurrence.
It feels a bit surreal, because we have faced the same situation. So far, my results
have been encouraging. At the same time, her news has not been ideal. As she awaits treatment, I await my own three
month window in January to get the all clear or the definitive diagnosis.
Today I am grateful for hope and optimism.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday November 15, 2007
Last week while driving for normal errands, I saw an area of fall trees that was especially beautiful. It seemed that
some of the trees were even pink. Each time I passed them, I regretted not having my camera with me. I didn't want to miss
getting a permanent reminder of our beautiful fall. Yesterday I took my camera, knowing I would forever regret not getting
"the shot".
I underestimated what it would take, but suffice it to say---after an unexpected power walk close to a mile (wearing LL Bean
gardening shoes no less), someone stopping to check on me (I wonder if they were thinking I was going to jump from the bridge?), a few
random "happy" truck drivers, and a brief conversation with a police officer, I got the shot.
The light wasn't quite right to photograph the colors as they really were, but I can still see those pinks in my mind.
Here's a couple other shots from the same place:
more color
the horizon
I'm glad I took these, because tonight it looks like this outside!
Today I am grateful for pink trees.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday November 14, 2007
It was time to winterize the pond, which Frank did yesterday. That meant removing all of the equipment, cutting down and
sinking the water plants. In the process, Frank found a salamander at the pond. Guess which of my girls was eagerly holding it,
fascinated? It's my little tomboy, Hannah.
I've known all summer that I needed to find homes for some of my fish. They've done remarkably well, but the downside is
that they have grown so much that the pond is overcrowded. One of the businesses I frequent said they would take them, and I
knew they would have more room to swim and ultimately it would be best for them and the fish left in my pond.
Although these are fish, in an outdoor pond, I am still bonded to them. I interacted with these fish almost every day. It was
very difficult to choose which ones would go to a new home. I ended up choosing the four that made most sense, primarily based
on size. My mom and dad no longer have their ponds and last year I took a couple of their fish that were "special" to us. One
in particular is named "Trauma" and at ten years old now, there was no way I would give him up, even though he is large.
(There's a big story behind that name and I'll share that later) My new baby, the first baby born in my pond had to stay also.
In addition, I wanted to keep some of my original pond fish that were placed the day we put the pond in a few years ago.
I settled on the four that would be moved, and Frank took them out of the pond at lunch, so I could quickly drive them to
their new home. I reached in and touched each one and said goodbye. Many of you won't "get" that, but I am an animal lover.
These are not disposable creatures or used solely for decoration. In Princeton, I watched them placed in a huge tank, where they will become the store owners personal fish. They swam happily
in the tank, and I left them--but not without sorrow.
I took this after they were placed in the cooler.
For size perspective, I'll tell you that the silver one is over 12" long. He was about 4" when I first got him. I should
say "her" because they think she may be female and perhaps she is the one that gave birth to the baby this year.
Today I am grateful for a family who "get it".
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday November 13, 2007
"Most people are so busy knocking themselves out trying to do everything they think they should do, they never get around to
do what they want to do."
Today I am grateful for the mountain view from my living room.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday November 12, 2007
A little gift from nature.
Today I am grateful for glitter pens and little girls.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday November 11, 2007
For years, we have laughed at (and with) my Mom for her "mixed up" clichés. She would only remember part of
one and use a wrong word, unknowingly. She is famous for saying "If it would have been a dog, it would have bit you."
We told her it was snake instead of dog, and she replied "That's what we say in England." Many years later, and many
misspoken clichés later, we still have a good time playing with her about it, even bringing out the "That's the way they
say it in England" excuse.
Yesterday Frank and I were talking--
Me: "Well join the boat."
Frank: "The boat? What are you talking about?"
Me: "Join the boat. Wait. Ship? What is it supposed to be?"
Frank: "Join the crowd."
Me: "Oh my gosh, I just morphed into my mother."
Today I am grateful for a warm home.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday November 10, 2007
Fun with bubble gum! Who can blow the biggest bubble?
Abigail's just popped!
Hannah gives it a go
Today I am grateful for Silver.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday November 9, 2007
Between cool temperatures and Hannah having a bad cough/cold, I haven't strayed far from home in a few days. Today
I went to the grocery store, and the brisk air and sprinkling rain were wonderful reminders that I AM ALIVE.
Today I am grateful for fall mountain colors.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday November 8, 2007
"When we have done our best, we should wait the result in peace."
Today I am grateful for candles glowing in the windows.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday November 7, 2007
Summer lingered into fall and now winter wants to come early. The temperatures have dropped and I am more than
glad to stay cozy indoors.
Today I am grateful for the crackling logs in the fireplace.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday November 6, 2007
"Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, but only saps today of its strength."
Today I am grateful for a "no school" day.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday November 5, 2007
In England, it's Guy Fawkes Day, celebrated with fireworks. Since I was born there, my family has always joked that the entire
country celebrates my birthday. I'm not sure how the years passed so quickly, but today I am 44 years old. I'm happy in my forties, I know that.
Thank you for the e-cards, emails, and birthday wishes. It was a nice day-- I talked to my brothers on the phone, Mom
fixed dinner for me and it ended with time with my family and an evening rain...my favorite.
Today I am grateful for a special shared symbolic bond of friendship.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday November 4, 2007
"You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no result."
Today I am grateful for musical cards and dictionaries.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday November 3, 2007
It was LEAF DAY today! Although the girls had played in the leaves this season, we went bigger today. I had made a pile of
leaves from the deck and the girls raked even more into mounds. They each had their own mountain to dive into and play for
the day.
Here's a few shots:
Hannah sits in front of her pile
I covered Hannah with leaves
Abigail at her stack of leaves
Where's Abigail? Where's Waldo?
Abigail all smiles
One more mountain in the evening, before Daddy picks them up with the John Deere
Today I am grateful for thousands of dried leaves.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday November 2, 2007
Today was quite a day for Tazewell. Dr. Phil kicked off the Toys for Tots campaign here. He and his wife Robin arrived
by train and distributed toys and coats. People were gathered everywhere to see him, especially at the railroad crossings.
Roads were closed in the area. I had to laugh when I was on my back deck, sweeping some leaves. I heard a sound and looked
up...and there was his train. At least I didn't have to even leave my house. :)
Dr. Phil & Robin arrive
Dr. Phil speaks
Toys For Tots, Tonka
photos by my friend Debbie
Today I am grateful for toys and trains.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday November 1, 2007
I met with the new immunologist today. He was very thorough, and I am hoping there will be opportunities to boost my
immune system. He did repeat some of my allergy testing and confirmed my known allergies. I will continue to get those
injections. He ordered several blood tests, some of which I had never heard of before. At times it was like he was
speaking a foreign language to me, and that made me happy. After living in the medical world for seven years, I consider
myself fairly well educated about my health, my body, medicine and testing-- and to hear him discuss blood tests that
were unknown to me gave me hope. I'll go to "my hospital" tomorrow for the blood work and meet with him in two weeks for the
results. I will also be getting my first flu and pneumonia vaccines as well.
Today I am grateful for a patient physician.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday October 31, 2007
Why I love this season~
Today I am grateful for children and pumpkin games.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday October 30, 2007
"Here the free spirit of mankind, at length,
Throws its last fetters off; and who shall place
A limit to the giant's unchained strength,
Or curb his swiftness in the forward race?"
Today I am grateful for books.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday October 29, 2007
"Frost is the greatest artist in our clime - He paints in nature and describes in rime."
We had our first heavy frost last night. We've had a couple light ones this season, but this morning everything
was white. The girls were thrilled when they looked outside.
Today I am grateful for nature's surprises.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday October 28, 2007
Hannah-ism: Abigail and Hannah collect business cards. Abigail's are neatly put into sleeves in
a binder and Hannah likes to make rubber banded piles with hers. Yesterday our friend Michael gave them both one that said
"Eagle Excavation".
Hannah: "Eagle Exca...what does e-x-c-a-v-a-t-i-o-n spell?"
Me: "Excavation. It means digging or clearing out."
Hannah: "Clearing out the eagles?!?!?"
Me: "No, honey, dirt, rocks and stuff. Eagle is just the name of the company."
Hannah: "Good, because they would be in trouble getting eagles. That's out national bird!"
Today I am grateful for Sunday breakfast.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday October 27, 2007
Only one calls me "sissy".
Happy Birthday, Brother!!
Today I am grateful for shared email laughter.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday October 26, 2007
"Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children."
Today I am grateful that my girls live beside their grandparents.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday October 25, 2007
"If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again."
Today I am grateful for rain.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday October 24, 2007
At last we have rain. Everything is so dry and brown and we haven't mowed in months---but nothing compares to the horror of the fires in California.
Half a million people have been evacuated and the damage is impossible to comprehend.
Prayers for all those that are suffering....
Today I am grateful for the kindness of strangers.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday October 23, 2007
Today was the day. All good news. Another step in the right direction.
The four biopsies were all benign and that "mystery tissue" he found was also benign. We'll never know where it came from.
Perhaps it has caused problems all along.
There cannot be a bad outcome at this point. I go once in November and once in December for a urinalysis, just to see if infection tries to return.
I am always asymptomatic, so without the test, I won't really know. In January, I will have the repeat FISH. Negative means I am cancer free. Positive means
another scope and hope the cancer will be visible for him to remove. This would likely be a stage zero with minimal treatment.
I would then have tests every three months to check for recurrence.
Neither of these are bad news scenarios. I will ask the Lord that there be no cancer, but beyond that I will also thank Him for putting me in a situation for early
detection should I be positive. Without this "infectious intervention" I would have never known what was going on in my body...and since I had my scans in
April THIS year, my next tests wouldn't be until 2009. TWO YEARS. A lot can happen in a bladder in two years.
I can find no negative in this situation, but only thankful that the Lord continues to shelter an undeserving soul like me.
With the initial positive test, it doesn't mean that God has not intervened and healed me. The next three months will not
feel like a waiting game, and I will live each day as I have done in the past. I am at peace.
Today I am grateful for another successful doctor's visit.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday October 22, 2007
CORPORATE PARTNERSHIP NEWS: With your simple everyday shopping, your dollars can go toward
research, early detection, and fighting for a cure! Please support these companies. Each has made
varying committments in dollars they will donate to Komen.
Susan G. Komen For the Cure, Corporate Partners:
3M
From October 1, 2007, through March 31, 2008, 3M will sell specially marked packages of Lint Rollers and single lint rollers to benefit Komen for the Cure. 3M will donate $1 for each package of lint rollers sold and $0.28 for every single lint roller sold and will make a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000.
ACH Food Companies, Inc.
Specially-marked packages of Argo Cornstarch, Kingsford Cornstarch, Fleischmann’s Yeast, Karo Syrup, Mazola Corn Oil & Pan Spray and Spice Island Spices will be sold in grocery stores and mass merchandise outlets nationwide from October 1, 2007 through September 30, 2008. Komen for the Cure will receive 25 cents per UPC code submitted online or by mail, and 10 cents per recipe entered at www.bakeforthecure.com, with a minimum guaranteed donation of $250,000 up to $350,000.
Acushnet- Titleist, Cobra and FootJoy Worldwide
In its eleventh year of support of Susan G. Komen for the Cure, Acushnet- Titleist, Cobra and FootJoy Worldwide provide golfers with a distinctive reminder that early detection is the key to survival by featuring the Komen logo on Titleist and Pinnacle golf balls. In conjunction with Rally for the Cure®, Titleist provides a pink ribbon custom-imprinted golf ball for every golfer who "hits the green." This grassroots initiative reaches thousands of golfers worldwide and makes a guaranteed donation of $200,000.
American Airlines
Since 1992, Susan G. Komen for the Cure has partnered with American Airlines, National Sponsor of the Komen Race for the Cure® Series. For 2007 American Airlines will continue their specially designed team shirts for their employees to wear when participating in a Komen Race with 10 percent of the sales price of these shirts benefiting Komen for the Cure. American Airlines also provides airline tickets for Komen official business travel, as well as three American Airlines tickets to each Komen Race for the Cure®. These tickets are used by the Affiliate Network for prizes and Affiliate travel.
American Italian Pasta Company
Specially-marked packages of Mueller’s, Golden Grain, Anthony’s, Luxury, Martha Gooch, R&F and Ronco brand spaghetti, thin spaghetti and elbow macaroni will be available in grocery stores nationwide from October 1, 2007 through November 30, 2007. American Italian Pasta Company will make a guaranteed donation of $150,000 to Komen for the Cure in conjunction with this program.
Bausch & Lomb
As part of Bausch & Lomb’s Solutions for the Cure program, specially-marked packages of Bausch & Lomb ReNu Multi-Plus contact lens solution and Sight Savers’ contact lens cases and Micro Fiber cloths will be sold in grocery and drug stores and mass merchandise outlets nationwide from September 1, 2007 – October 31, 2007. Komen for the Cure will receive 75 cents per bottle of solution, 16 cents per cloth and 15 cents per lens case with a minimum guaranteed donation of $250,000.
Belk
Belk will host an event throughout the first weekend of October to support breast cancer awareness efforts and raise funds for Komen for the Cure; for more information visit www.belk.com.
Belkin
From May 1, 2007, through July 31, 2008, Belkin will donate 10 percent of the retail sales price from each specially designed MP3 player case sold to Komen for the Cure with a minimum guaranteed donation of $225,000.
Better Homes and Gardens
In October 2007, Better Homes and Gardens will release “Celebrating the Promise,” a new cookbook commemorating Komen for the Cure’s 25th year as a leader in the movement to save lives and end breast cancer forever. The company will make a guaranteed minimum donation of $250,000 in conjunction with the new book, which will feature a 64-page special section dedicated to women’s health, new recipes and anecdotes from celebrity chefs, including Paula Deen and Sara Moulton.
BMW of North America, Inc.
The BMW Ultimate Drive is a grassroots program that gives community members the opportunity to get involved in the breast cancer movement. For every mile driven during the BMW Ultimate Drive event, $1.00 is donated to Komen, with a minimum guaranteed donation of $1,000,000. Developed by BMW in partnership with Komen, two fleets of specially badged BMWs crisscross the country visiting participating BMW Retail Centers. The drive will continue through October 2007, inviting consumers to get behind the wheel and help contribute to the breast cancer movement.
Boston Market
In 2007, Susan G. Komen for the Cure and Boston Market bring their partnership to a new level and introduce Catering for the Cure®. For every catering order placed, Boston Market will donate $2 to Komen with a guaranteed donation of $250,000.
Brinker International
Susan G. Komen for the Cure's Brinker International Awards for Breast Cancer Research are funded by an endowment established by Brinker International, Inc. The awards are given annually at the San Antonio Breast Cancer Conference to formally recognize and honor individuals, before their peers, for their outstanding achievements in the fields of basic and clinical breast cancer research.
Campbell Soup Company
Limited edition pink and white cans of condensed Chicken Noodle and Tomato soup will be available at participating retailers nationwide throughout the month of October. Komen for the Cure will receive a guaranteed donation of $100,000 in conjunction with this program.
Caribou Coffee Company, Inc.
Throughout the months of May and October, Caribou Coffee will sell Amy’s Blend coffees to honor the life of Amy Erickson, a member of the Caribou Coffee roasting family. Caribou Coffee will donate $100,000 to Komen for the Cure to further the promise to save lives and end breast cancer forever. For more information, please visit www.cariboucoffee.com.
Carlisle Collection, Ltd.
Carlisle produces luxurious scarves which represent their commitment to women’s good health and well-being. When a Carlisle customer makes a donation payable to Komen for the Cure of $125 or more through a Carlisle Consultant, she receives this special scarf. Contributions from the program have totaled more than $1 million to date. For more information or to locate the Carlisle Consultant nearest you, visit www.carlislecollection.com.
CHI-CHI’S® Salsa
Hormel Foods has chosen Komen for the Cure as the beneficiary of the CHI-CHI’S® Salsa coupon redemption program. For each specially marked coupon redeemed, the maker of CHI-CHI’S® Salsa will donate 25 cents to Komen, with a guaranteed minimum donation of $150,000, and a maximum donation of $175,000. For more information, please visit www.chichissalsa.com.
ClubCorp-ClubCorp Charity Classic
In honor of ClubCorp’s 50th Anniversary, ClubCorp will hold the world’s largest one-day charity golf and dining event. All proceeds raised during the ClubCorp Charity Classic will be divided and donated to MDA, The PGA Foundation, ClubCorp’s Employee Partners Care Foundation and Susan G Komen for the Cure.
Coldwater Creek
Coldwater Creek hosts Fashion for the Cure® events at their retail stores. These after-hours wardrobe parties, complete with refreshments, fashion tips, and a guest survivor speaker, offer customers the opportunity to shop at a 10 percent discount, with Coldwater Creek donating an additional 10 percent of event sales to the local Komen Affiliate. In addition, Coldwater Creek offers the In Pink Gift Card, 10 percent of the purchase price is donated to Komen for the Cure; go to www.coldwatercreek.com for more information.
Dockers®
Susan G. Komen is the beneficiary of Levis Strauss & Co. through its Dockers® "Khakis for the Cause" program. Dockers® women’s pink ribbon collection will be sold at Dockers® stores and retailers nationwide from August 31, 2007 through December 31, 2008. Komen for the Cure will receive $1 per item sold with a guaranteed minimum donation of $100,000 for the program period.
eBags.com
In support of Susan G. Komen for the Cure, eBags will sell pink bags from their Pick Pink page on the eBags Web site. Each bag involved in the program will be highlighted with a pink ribbon on the Web site and eBags will donate 10 percent of the retail sales price of each pink bag sold with a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000. To learn more about the Pick Pink program, visit www.ebags.com.
Energizer®
Energizer® supports the breast cancer movement by offering consumers the opportunity to receive a limited edition “Keep Going” Charm Bracelet, by redeeming three proofs of purchase from select Energizer® products by December 31, 2007. Energizer will also donate $1.00 to Komen for each Charm Bracelet redeemed up to a maximum donation of $10,000. Additionally, during the month of October, Energizer® will donate $0.50 to Komen for each battery pack sold with a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000 up to a maximum donation of $200,000.
Ford Division
The Warriors in Pink initiative was created to continue the support of the Komen Race for the Cure® Series. The collection of Warriors in Pink apparel for women and men feature bold symbols that embody the Warrior credo of taking charge, living out loud, harnessing power and standing together. 100 percent of the net proceeds* from the sale of each item supports Komen for the Cure. For more information about donation amounts per product please visit www.fordcares.com. In 2007, Ford launched several new components to the Warriors in Pink program, including a partnership with NBC’s “Deal or No Deal” to air a special episode on Friday, October 19th dedicated to Warriors in Pink and breast cancer awareness. Ford also announced the first-ever 2008 Mustang with Warriors in Pink package to benefit Komen for the Cure. Available on V-6 Coupe or Convertible models in three colors, the Mustang with Warriors in Pink package will add a pink ribbon and Pony fender badge, pink Mustang rocker tape striping and pink interior accents. $250 from the sale of each package goes directly to Komen. Additionally, Ford’s online charity auction featuring scale models of Warriors in Pink edition Ford Mustang, signed and decorated by celebrities including the casts of Desperate Housewives, House, Grey’s Anatomy, David Arquette, Courtney Cox, and Kelly Clarkson. Legendary race car drivers John Force and Matt Kenseth have also joined the fight against breast cancer by signing and decorating these models Warriors in Pink Ford Mustangs. These cars will be available through an on-line charity auction, www.ebay.com/WarriorsinPink beginning October 15th and continuing through October 25th with 100 percent of the proceeds benefiting Susan G. Komen for the Cure.
Fox Home Entertainment
From September 1, 2007 through May 31, 2008, Fox Home Entertainment will sell popular DVD titles in special pink ribbon packaging in retail stores nationwide. The DVDs will be sold at a suggested retail price of $14.95. Fox Home Entertainment will donate $0.50 to Komen for the Cure for each DVDs for the Cure video sold, with a guaranteed minimum donation of $250,000.
Francesca's Collections
From September 1, 2007, through August 31, 2008, Francesca’s Collections will sell a silver chain necklace with a pink enamel ribbon charm and pink Austrian crystal heart charm to benefit Komen for the Cure. Additionally, Francesca’s will sell Greek Letter charms to be added to the necklace. Francesca’s will donate $9 for each necklace sold and $2 for each Greek charm sold and will make a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000. For more information please visit www.francescascollections.com.
Fresh Express
"Find Inspiration in Every Bag!" Specially-marked packages of Fresh Express' Baby Blends salad mixes will be sold in grocery stores and mass merchandise outlets nationwide from October 1 through 31, 2007. Komen for the Cure will receive 10 cents per package with a guaranteed minimum donation of $200,000.
General Mills' Pink for the Cure
During the month of October in grocery retailers nationwide, General Mills brands will turn their packages pink to support October’s National Breast Cancer Awareness Month and Komen for the Cure. Brands going Pink for the Cure include Cheerios, Total Raisin Bran, Total Honey Nut Clusters, Green Giant, Progresso Soup, Betty Crocker Warm Delights, Betty Crocker cookie mixes, Betty Crocker Hamburger Helper and Betty Crocker Potatoes. Komen for the Cure will receive $2 million for the Pink for the Cure program.
George Weston Bakeries, Inc.
Specially-marked packages of Arnold, Brownberry, and Freihofer’s breads, Thomas’ English muffins, and Entenmann’s bakery products will be available at grocery stores and mass merchandise outlets nationwide from September 24, 2007 - October 27, 2007. George Weston Bakeries will make a guaranteed donation of $100,000 to Komen for the Cure in conjunction with this program. In addition, George Weston Bakeries has partnered with Komen National Race Series Sponsor New Balance to offer a special pink bracelet by mail with 2 UPC labels and a minimum $5.00 donation. All monies raised will benefit Susan G. Komen for the Cure.
Hallmark Gold Crown Stores
As part of the Card for the Cure program: The Everyday Card, available February 15 through the end of 2007, with 10 percent from the sale of each card to be donated to Komen. The music CD, Believe..Songs to Uplift the Spirit featuring original artists will be available to buy with each purchase of three Hallmark cards, $1 from the sale of each CD will be donated to Komen. The book, “The Spirit of Hope” will be available with 10 percent from the sale to be donated to Komen. The Keepsake Ornament, Angel of Hope, returns with $2 from the sale of each ornament being donated to Komen. Through these promotions, Hallmark will make a minimum guaranteed donation of $200,000.
HSN
From October 1 through October 31, 2007, HSN will sell various items to benefit Komen live on the air and on www.hsn.com. The retail sales price and benefit to Komen varies per product, and HSN will make a $250,000 minimum guaranteed donation through this initiative. HSN will also solicit donations from viewers throughout the month of October, and 100% of the funds collected will be donated to Komen. For a complete product listing and more information, visit www.hsn.com, keyword search “pink”.
KitchenAid®
During 2007, KitchenAid is proud to donate a minimum of $1,000,000 to Susan G. Komen for the Cure in conjunction with its pink product collection. Consumers must register each pink product purchased at www.cookforthecure.com to generate a donation. Since 2001, Cook for the Cure® has raised more than $5 million for Komen for the Cure and earned such accolades as the Cause Marketing Forum’s prestigious Halo Award. For more information, visit www.cookforthecure.com. New in 2007, purchase any KitchenAid® countertop appliance from the pink product collection at www.CookForTheCure.com or www.ShopKitchenAid.com through the end of October and receive a free limited-edition Better Homes and Gardens® "Pink Plaid" cookbook by mail. The collection includes the popular Artisan® Stand Mixer, 12-Cup Food Processor and 5-Speed Blender (carrying suggested retail prices of $349.99, $249.99 and $149.99, respectively); each of which generates a donation to the cause when registered on www.CookForTheCure.com.
Koss
As part of the Pink Ribbon Sportsclips and Earbuds headphones program, the SportsClips and Earbuds will be sold from August 1, 2007, through July 31, 2008. Komen for the Cure will receive $2.50 from each pair sold with a guaranteed donation of $100,000.
LEAN CUISINE®
Beginning September 1, 2007, LEAN CUISINE® will distribute specially marked packages of their frozen entrees highlighting their partnership with Komen for the Cure. Additionally, LEAN CUISINE will offer three new insulated designer lunch bags, for purchase at www.LeanCuisine.com. The bags will sell for $9.95, of which $5.00 will be donated to Komen with a minimum donation of $50,000.
LIFE Event-The Val Skinner Foundation
Susan G. Komen for the Cure benefits annually from the LIFE Event (LPGA Pros In the Fight to Eradicate Breast Cancer) that is held each year. The LIFE Event is a premier golf event supporting the fight against breast cancer. In six years, the LIFE Event has raised $3.5 million, with $1.75 million benefiting Komen for the Cure. The mission of the LIFE Event is to raise funds to reach a younger generation of women with information about early detection and the importance of healthy breast care practices. 2007's guaranteed donation is $250,000.
Lowe’s Companies, Inc.
Throughout October, Lowe’s Companies, Inc. will invite customers to Plant for the Cure® to help raise funds in the fight against breast cancer during their annual fundraiser for Komen for the Cure. Through the Plant for the Cure® program Lowe’s will donate 10 percent of the retail sales price of select mums in October (bearing the Plant for the Cure® tag) to Komen for the Cure. For more information, please visit www.lowes.com.
LPGA
LPGA members actively support Komen for the Cure through numerous pro-ams and tournaments across the nation. LPGA players wear pink ribbons on their hats and shirts at tournaments across the country to show support for the women within and outside the LPGA family who are fighting breast cancer. This simple action focuses media attention on the ribbons and continues to open the door for commentators at tournaments across the country to tell the story of the ribbon and why the LPGA has partnered with Komen for the Cure.
LPGA Golf Clinics
Komen for the Cure will benefit from the LPGA Golf Clinics for Women, hosted and organized by the Jane Blaylock Company. The events include 15 one-day golf clinics held across the country, designed specifically for the female golfer. Players receive personalized instruction from LPGA teaching professionals. The clinics serve to educate women about the importance of early detection and to raise funds for Komen for the Cure through a silent auction.
M&M’S® Brand Chocolate Candies
From August 15 through October 31, 2007, Mars Snackfood, US will once again sell specially marked bags of dark pink and light pink M&M'S® Chocolate Candies in grocery and retail outlets throughout the nation. In conjunction with this program, Mars Snackfood, US will make a donation of $550,000 to Komen for the Cure. For more information, visit www.mms.com. New this year… MY M&M’S® is offering the “Promise Blend”, Komen branded pink and white M&M’S®, available exclusively online. Ten percent of the retail sales price of each purchase will benefit Komen. For more information, visit www.mymms.com/sgk. Also new to this year’s program is an exciting array of co-branded gift items that will be available in national retail outlets, as well as at the M&M’S® World stores in Las Vegas, Orlando and New York. Up to 10 percent of the retail sales prices of these items will benefit Komen. For more information, visit www.mmsworld.com.
Major League Baseball
Help your home team hit one out of the ballpark with Susan G. Komen for the Cure and Major League Baseball’s Going to Bat Against Breast Cancer, a month long program to create awareness about breast cancer and the importance of early detection, while also raising funds to support the mission of Komen for the Cure. The boys of summer and their teams are taking the challenge to raise $25,000 to stay in every team’s local community! Fans will be able to log onto www.komen.org/mlb and make a monetary donation to their favorite team and support the breast cancer movement.
Mariani Packing Co., Inc.
Snack Pink and help save a life™ program: From August 2007 through May 2008, Mariani dried fruits will be sold in grocery stores and club outlets nationwide. Komen for the Cure will receive a guaranteed donation of $414,000.
Microsoft
Susan G. Komen for the Cure proudly welcomes Microsoft as a partner through the i’m making a difference initiative. Every time you start a conversation using i’m, Microsoft will donate a portion of the program's advertising revenue with some of the world's most effective organizations dedicated to social causes, including Susan G. Komen for the Cure. Microsoft will make a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000 to each participating charity.
Mohawk Industries, Inc.
Mohawk Industries, Inc., the manufacturer of Durkan Commercial and Karastan Contract commercial carpets, will donate 25 cents per square yard sold in its commercial market with a minimum guaranteed donation of $250,000. For more information or to locate a Mohawk consultant near you, visit www.themohawkgroup.com.
New Balance Athletic Shoe, Inc.
From January 1, 2007 through December 31, 2007, New Balance will donate fifteen percent of wholesale sales for each product sold from the Lace Up for the Cure® Pink Ribbon Collection. Lace Up footwear and apparel is distinguished by pink tissue paper in the shoebox, as well as hang-tags, and other in-store signage, that explains the significance of the pink ribbon as the icon for breast cancer awareness and the company’s association with Komen for the Cure. For more information, please visit www.newbalance.com/komen.
On Deck for the Cure™
With a goal to raise $1 million in its second year, On Deck for the Cure was launched last year by Holland America and encompasses fundraisers on dozens of the brands’ ships (Carnival Cruise Lines, Costa Cruises, Princess Cruises, The Yachts of Seabourn), with guests making a donation benefiting Komen for the Cure and participating in five-kilometer walks and other activities on the vessels’ open decks. The cruise lines will donate 75 percent of each registration fee to Komen for the Cure, with a minimum guaranteed donation of $260,000.
On The Border – Fiesta for the Cure™
To celebrate both Komen for the Cure and On The Border’s 25th anniversaries, guests at On The Border restaurants will have the opportunity throughout October to make a donation and have their name displayed on celebratory Fiesta For the Cure™ coasters in the lobby. Additionally, On The Border will sell Fiesta for the Cure™ T-shirts for $12 and will donate $5 from each shirt sold to Komen. The minimum guaranteed donation to Komen for Fiesta for the Cure™ hosted by On The Border’s is $250,000.
Oreck
From March 1, 2007, through February 28, 2008, Oreck is committed to supporting Komen for the Cure through the sale of their Special Edition Clean for the Cure® vacuum cleaners. For each pink Clean for the Cure® Oreck XL Ultra® Upright and the XL 21 Vacuum Cleaner sold, Oreck will make a donation of $50 for the XL Ultra® Upright and $70 XL 21 Vacuum Cleaner for the to Komen for the Cure, with a minimum guarantee of $500,000. The Clean for the Cure® vacuums are available for purchase in Oreck retail stores, at Oreck party events, on the Oreck Web site, or by calling 1.800.237.4181. For more information, please visit www.cleanforthecure.com.
Payless ShoeSource
Payless ShoeSource will continue its Taking Steps to Fight Breast Cancer program by selling breast cancer awareness bracelets and limited-edition pink ribbon slippers. One hundred percent of the net profits* earned from the sale of the bracelet and $1.30 from the sale of each pair of slippers will be donated to Komen for the Cure with a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000. The products will be available for purchase in Payless ShoeSource stores nationwide and on www.payless.com beginning September 27 and continuing through February 28, 2008.
Pepperidge Farm®
Susan G. Komen for the Cure and Pepperidge Farm will partner on a program featuring specially marked packages of cookies, including Milano, Double Chocolate Milano, Strawberry Verona, Chessmen and more. These packages will be offered on store shelves in the grocery, drug, mass merchandise and club channels throughout the year. Komen for the Cure will benefit from a minimum guaranteed donation of $110,000.
Philips
From October 1, 2007, through May 31, 2008, Philips will produce a Pink Portable DVD Player sold exclusively at Best Buy. Philips will donate $150,000 to Komen for the Cure in conjunction with this program.
Pier 1 Imports
Pier 1's array of items that benefit Komen for the Cure include a candle, whose design is remodeled every August, a silk and hand-beaded Jewelry box and an embroidered shawl. 25 percent of the sales price of all items sold goes to benefit Komen and supports breast cancer research with a minimum guaranteed donation of $250,000. New in 2007, Pier 1 goes the extra mile and adds the Pier 1 gift card to benefit Komen with $1 donated for every gift card sold.
PNY Technologies, Inc.
From October 1, 2007, through December 31, 2007, PNY will sell two Secure Digital Memory Cards (2 GB and 4 GB) to benefit Komen for the Cure at Best Buy, Staples and Circuit City. PNY will donate $100,000 to Komen in conjunction with this program.
ProFlowers.com
Through the Pink Ribbon Collection, ProFlowers.com donates 10 percent of the retail price from each purchase to Komen for the Cure with a minimum guaranteed donation of $50,000. Each bouquet or tree is delivered with important information from Komen about breast health. To view the Pink Ribbon Collection, please visit www.proflowers.com/cure.
Quilted Northern Ultra®
Quilted Northern Ultra® supports Komen for the Cure and its Affiliates through their on pack donation program. Quilted Northern Ultra® will donate 50 cents to Komen for every proof-of-purchase collected from specially marked pink ribbon packages of Quilted Northern Ultra® through December 31, 2007 (minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000 up to a maximum of $500,000). Consumers can log on to www.quiltednorthernultra.com and enter the unique code online to activate the donation to the Komen Headquarters or a local Komen Affiliate. Consumers can also mail in the UPC to the address noted on specially marked packages.
Qwest and SANYO
Beginning in June and continuing through the end of December, wireless phone users can help raise funds and awareness for the fight against breast cancer by purchasing SANYO® pink phones with Qwest Wireless®. For each phone sold, 10 percent of the retail sales price will be donated to Komen for the Cure with a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000 up to a maximum donation of $150,000. For more information, please visit www.qwestwireless.com or www.sanyo.com/wireless.
Rally for the Cure®
Since its inception, the Rally program’s goal has been to increase breast health awareness among amateur women golfers by supporting the mission of Susan G. Komen for the Cure and in 2007, Rally for the Cure expanded its program to include Tennis.
A registration fee of $20 per person entitles each Rally participant to enter a closest-to-the-pin contest at a designated par-3 hole. Each winner of the competitive contest wins a significant golf prize. Educational materials provided by Komen are distributed to every entrant, along with the symbolic pink ribbon pin with a golf club designed exclusively for Rally for the Cure®. In addition, each participant is entitled to a one-year subscription of Golf For Women® magazine. Guaranteed donation of $3,000,000.
RE/MAX International
RE/MAX International, along with co-sponsor Zeta Tau Alpha Fraternity, celebrates breast cancer survivors by providing the signature pink t-shirts and caps for survivors to wear during the Komen Race for the Cure® events. Race participants receive “In Memory of” and “In Celebration of” back signs to honor a friend or loved one.
The Republic of Tea
The Republic of Tea continues it commitment in 2007, donating partial proceeds from the sale of a variety of products designed to raise awareness and funds for Komen for the Cure. Among these products is its signature Sip for the Cure® line, which includes five pink tea varieties: Pink Grapefruit Green Tea (regular and decaf), Pink Lemonade Green Tea, Pink Rose Green Tea and Pink Lady® Apple Green Tea. Also included in the program are 250-count bulk bags of tea, 50-count single serve of Pink Grapefruit Tea, and Pink Grapefruit Tea Marmalade. Guaranteed minimum donation $100,000.
Schick
“Give Comfort. Get Comfort.” program: Specially-marked packages of Schick’s ST, ST Sensitive, X3D Comfort Plus, X3D Sensitive and Quattro disposable razors will be sold at grocery stores, drug stores and mass merchandise outlets nationwide from October 1 through November 30, 2007. Komen for the Cure will receive a guaranteed donation of $125,000 in conjunction with this program.
Serta Mattress Company
Throughout 2007, Serta Mattress Company is encouraging everyone to fight breast cancer while they sleep! Serta is producing and selling limited-edition pink mattress sets designed by Vera Wang and collector’s edition pink Serta-branded Counting Sheep at participating Serta retailers in conjunction with the promotion. As part of its commitment to the cause, Serta is donating $290,000 to Komen, $260,000 from Serta and its US facilities and $30,000 from Serta Canada. Komen will give the $30,000 donated from Serta Canada to the Canadian Breast Cancer Foundation.
Simon Malls
From September 1, 2006, through August 31, 2008, Simon Malls will sell a Pink Ribbon gift card in their retail centers nationwide and online at www.simon.com. The gift cards will be sold in denominations ranging from $20 to $500. Simon Malls will donate $1 to Komen for the Cure for each gift card sold, with a guaranteed minimum donation of $250,000 per year.
SunChips®
In addition to supporting Komen Race for the Cure®, SunChips® brand created the Crunch for the Cure™ SunChips® pink ribbon bag program. Consumers can submit proofs of purchase from specially marked bags of SunChips® Snacks online at www.sunchips.com, and SunChips® will donate 25 cents to Komen for the Cure for each proof of purchase submitted with a minimum guarantee of $100,000 up to $350,000.
Tomboy Tools®
From September 1, 2007, through August 30, 2008, Tomboy Tools® will sell a pink 13-ounce hammer and the pink Tomboy Traveler toolkit to benefit Komen for the Cure. Tomboy Tools® will donate $3 for each pink hammer and $7 for each traveler sold with a minimum guaranteed donation of $100,000.
United States Bowling Congress
USBC’s bowling leagues designate one league session of their choice each season as a Bowl for the Cure® event.Bowlers can designate one league night to donate a specific amount, such as a nickel per pin, or stage pledge nights, raffles and auctions. Local bowling associations also are encouraged to team up with Komen Affiliates to conduct a Bowl for the Cure® event for the entire community in their service area. For more information about Bowl for the Cure®, visit www.bowlforthecure.com.
VALLEY FRESH® Chicken
April 15 through October 31, 2007, Hormel Foods will make a 25 cents donation for each coupon for VALLEY FRESH® chunk chicken redeemed at point of purchase, with a guaranteed minimum donation of $100,000, up to $150,000 to Komen for the Cure. Additionally, VALLEY FRESH® Chicken will participate in a special promotion at Wal*Mart and in which they will make an additional donation of $50,000 to Komen. For more information, please visit www.valleyfreshkitchen.com.
Wacoal America
Wacoal will host Fit for the Cure® events to help women across the country find their perfect fit. For every woman fitted at a Fit for the Cure® event in Wacoal, Donna Karan Intimates, and DKNY Underwear, Wacoal will donate $2 to Komen for the Cure. No purchase is necessary. A specialist will provide a private consultation and also be on hand to help women make their selections. In addition to the fitting, women will be given information on early detection techniques and a guide to performing a breast self-exam. The benefits are twofold: getting properly fitted and helping a worthy cause. Furthering their commitment in 2007, Wacoal now offers the “Wacoal Promise,” providing every woman who signs up at one of Wacoal’s Fit for the Cure® events with a complimentary email reminder to conduct a monthly breast self-exam. Wacoal will also make a $2 donation to Komen for every Wacoal, Donna Karan intimate or DKNY underwear bra purchased at a Fit for the Cure® event. Wacoal will make a minimum guaranteed donation of $250,000.
Wüsthof
Wüsthof will sell specially marked cutlery from July 1, 2007, through December 31, 2007, to benefit Komen for the Cure. Komen will receive 10 percent from the retail sales price of each item with a guaranteed donation of $100,000.
Wyeth/ChapStick® Brand Lip Moisturizer
From January 25 through December 31, 2007 Wyeth will produce ChapStick® Brand Lip Moisturizer in pink packages. The packages will be sold nationwide in drug stores, grocery stores, and through mass merchandisers. ChapStick® will donate 30 cents per package with a guaranteed minimum donation of $100,000 to Komen for the Cure. For more information, please visit www.chapstick.com.
Yoplait USA
In addition to supporting the Komen Race for the Cure®, Yoplait sponsors the highly successful Save Lids to Save Lives® program, which takes place throughout September and October each year. For each pink lid mailed in by customers, Yoplait will donate 10 cents to Komen with a guaranteed donation of $500,000. For more information and for the Lids mailing address, visit the Yoplait Web site at www.yoplait.com.
Zeta Tau Alpha Fraternity
As a Co-Sponsor of the National Series Breast Cancer Survivor Recognition Program at Komen Race for the Cure® events, ZTA members nationwide volunteer countless hours in support of local Race events. ZTA, along with co-sponsor RE/MAX, celebrate breast cancer survivors by providing the signature pink t-shirts and caps for survivors to wear during the Race. Race participants receive “In Memory of” and “In Celebration of” back signs to honor a friend or loved one. Zeta Tau Alpha Foundation has funded a variety of programs associated with the fight against breast cancer. Zeta Tau Alpha has distributed 9.75 million breast self-exam cards, 6 million BSE reminders, and 3.5 million breast health information cards to further our promise to save lives and end breast cancer forever.
Today I am grateful for awareness.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday October 21, 2007
We only need to put the shutters on the storage building and the job is complete. They came in this week. Here's
proof that I
helped a few weeks
ago. Just don't ask how many nails I actually put in there. (Only enough to make it count)
This past week was Homecoming week at school and each day had a theme. The girls' favorites were
pajama day
and crazy hair day.
I put ponytails all over their heads using different colored bright bands, and sprayed their hair red. Here's a
back shot also.
Today I am grateful for endless generosity.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday October 20, 2007
Simple but true....
Today I am grateful for simplicity.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday October 19, 2007
BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH CONTINUES!
Don't forget your daily click (above) to fund free mammograms!
Today I am grateful for breakfast at Mom's.
Thank you God, for another day.
CORPORATE FUNDRAISER NEWS:
Garth Brooks has joined forces with Susan G. Komen for the Cure in the promise to end breast cancer forever, with the release of the “Pink Edition”
of The Ultimate Hits album. The album is a new 3-disc set, and contains 30 classics, 3 new songs and a bonus track on two CDs.
The set also includes a DVD with videos for all 33 songs, including new and never-before-seen footage.
For every “Pink Edition” of The Ultimate Hits album sold, $10 will go to Komen for the Cure. Each CD is packaged with important
information to help you protect your breast health, and the health of people you love.
The album is currently available for pre-orders, and will ship on November 5th. This is a Komen Promise Shop exclusive - click image below to order now and reserve yours today!
Thursday October 18, 2007
My recovery seems to be going very well, and by this evening I am virtually pain free.
Today I am grateful for crisp fall leaves.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday October 17, 2007
I'm home!
My surgery went well. Dr. Bender did the four biopsies as planned, but he did not do anything additional. He saw no abnormal
growths or papillary tumors. That's good news. Now we wait for the pathology results, which I will get next Tuesday. If cancerous,
we get a plan and move forward. If benign, I wait three months and repeat the FISH. If it comes back positive again, we also
repeat the scope, to see if it is a cancer than can be detected at that point. If the FISH comes back negative, I'm all clear.
For some strange reason, there was a piece of tissue floating in my bladder. He could see no area from which it came. He is sending it
for pathology along with the other four biopsies. If it comes back positive, he'll have no choice but to repeat the scope
and go into the ureters to see if there is a problem there. If it comes back negative, it will be written off as a mystery.
We have no idea if it came from inside my kidneys, the ureters, or where. For those of you that know me well, you may be chuckling a bit
right now. Don't worry, so am I. I have a history of "if something weird can happen medically, it will happen to Carolynn".
I'm feeling pretty good. The anesthesia didn't make me sick, and I took cipro through an IV. I do have some pain, but by tonight it
is starting to lessen. My throat is quite sore from the tube, but it didn't help that I had a lot of sinus drainage already. I
have two medications to take for a week, and I hope my stomach can tolerate them both. It's important that I get them both
in my system.
One more procedure behind me, and another step in the right direction.
Today I am grateful for a doctor with compassion.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday October 16, 2007
I didn't find out my surgery time until 4:30 today, when I went ahead and called them. They were supposed to call me between
2-4pm. I was bumped by a diabetic surgery so now I go to the hospital at 9:30am and I am scheduled for the OR at 10:25am. Hopefully
the previous two surgeries will proceed without incident and I'll be on time.
Since we're a little unsure what will be done to me, things are kind of up in the air. At this time, my recovery time is
unknown. As soon as I am able, I will update you with the results of my surgery.
Thank you all for the many cards, e-cards, and emails. Your show of love and support is truly appreciated.
No ocean can hold it back.
No river can overtake it.
No whirlwind can go faster.
No army can defeat it.
No law can stop it.
No distance can slow it.
No disease can cripple it.
No force on earth is more effective than the power of prayer.
Today I am grateful for silly night time giggles with Abigail.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday October 15, 2007
My dear friend Penny loves quotes as much as I do. Here's one she found that I just love.
"The road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they
both lead to the same destination."
Today I am grateful for the sound of my pond.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday October 14, 2007
"Touch a thistle timidly, and it pricks you; grasp it boldly, and its spines crumble."
Today I am grateful for red delicious apples.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday October 13, 2007
"Victory is won not in miles but in inches. Win a little now, hold your ground, and later, win a little more."
Today I am grateful for layers of warm clothing.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday October 12, 2007
Today I completed my pre-op procedures, including an EKG, chest x-ray, and blood work. Afterwards, I went upstairs to
meet with Dr. Stefanini. I wanted to let him know what had transpired in the past few weeks. I hadn't consulted with him
earlier until I had a better indication of what was going on. Now that surgery is scheduled, I wanted to give him a heads up,
so that if the diagnosis comes, he would be involved in my treatment plan. I would have it no other way. I feel extremely confident with
Dr. Bender--but Dr. Stefanini knows my entire history and previous cancer treatment. He agreed with Dr. Bender's tests and
plans for the cystoscopy/TURB, and said he would check on me Wednesday, as well as review the biopsies himself.
Today I am grateful for a very special paper clip.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday October 11, 2007
Temperatures have dropped to the forties overnight and fifties in the day. It's time to go through the girls' closets
and bring out the long sleeves and sweaters!
Today I am grateful for an appointment free day.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday October 10, 2007
"I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well."
Today I am grateful for purple blooming mums.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday October 9, 2007
Hannah-ism:
Hannah: "Mommy, the school nurse is sending a letter home to everyone."
Me: "About what?"
Hannah: "They want to know if we want to get a flea shot."
Today I am grateful for a proud moment of accomplishment.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday October 8, 2007
We went today for the CT IVP test results. Frank wanted to be with me, so he took the day off. This test was done primarily to
see if the cancer had spread to the ureters/kidneys. It came back negative--it hasn't left the bladder. That's the best answer
we could get today.
The CT cannot pick up very small lesions or flat tumors, but had there been some sort of growth in the ureters, the fluid/contrast
they used would not have been able to flow through them properly. The CT indicated that my kidneys and ureters are working fine.
So....Friday I go for pre-op x-rays, ekg, blood work, etc. Then on Wednesday of next week I will have surgery- a cystoscopy/TURB.
Cystosopies, as a screening tool by themselves, are sometimes done in an office with a local anesthesia, but since I am scheduled for TURB as well,
I'll be put to sleep and in the operating room. (TURB is for tumor removal) He has written orders beyond that procedure and
planned for "worst case scenario" so that if he goes in and finds anything really wrong, he'll have all the tools ready and
available to do whatever needs to be done at that time...without scheduling another procedure.
At a minimum he will biopsy four places in my bladder...in addition, he would remove any growth or abnormality he sees. There
is a chance he would have to do a bladder resection, but it is not expected.
The next step is to wait on the pathology. If it comes back confirming the cancer diagnosis from the FISH, we come up with a
treatment plan. If the biopsies come back negative, I'm not out of the woods quite yet. I would have to wait three months
and repeat the procedures. Bladder cancer is a recurring disease, and it may be a matter of a bit more time before it shows
itself beyond the FISH. (FISH is highly accurate, and highly sensitive. It's the BEST tool for early detection)
And now, on to the next step. I feel good about today's results.
Today I am grateful for a husband who has always carried me in his heart.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday October 7, 2007
It's All Abigail: Abigail has been called Puffer or Puff since she was first born. She's always been comfortable
with the name, and when she went to preschool she would tell people her name was Puffer! She still likes the name, lots of
people call her that instead of Abigail, she signs it often on cards and papers at home, but she must be getting to the age
where she is becoming selective when it is to be used.
Hannah: "Go Puffer!" (cheering her sister during the soccer game yesterday)
Hannah: "Puffer!! Hey, Puffer!!"
The game ended and she walked off the field all smiles.
Abigail: (laughing) "Hannah, plee-eease don't call me Puffer on the field!"
Today I am grateful for "I Am Sam".
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday October 6, 2007
Another weekend of soccer. It was an early game today for Abigail, and Hannah had the day off. The soccer
field always makes me happy.
Today I am grateful that I now have the strength to close the back of my SUV.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday October 5, 2007
"Never look down to test the ground before taking your next step; only he who keeps his eye fixed on the far horizon will find the right road."
Today I am grateful for another completed project.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday October 4, 2007
Hannah-ism: If Hannah eats a Happy Meal, most of the time she eats apples. We don't let her eat french fries
often, for nutritional reasons. They're an occasional treat, just like candy. Poppy picked them up from school and took
them to McDonalds as a surprise.
Abigail: "Hannah, you ordered fries!"
Hannah: "They're good."
Abigail: "They aren't good for you, remember?"
Hannah: "What?"
Abigail: "The grease, Hannah, the grease!"
Hannah: (laughing) "Grease tastes good!"
Today I am grateful for Mom's breakfast.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday October 3, 2007
Test day. This test will determine if the cancer has spread beyond the bladder--or if it picks up any indication of cancer
at all. This is the first time I have had a test scheduled in the evening, after hours. I don't think it was an accident
that it was scheduled for Wednesday at 7pm. That's when prayer meeting starts every week.
I went alone. Frank had offered to accompany me, as had my mom. I just didn't see the need. This is part of a routine.
I've had many scans done, and I knew there would be no knowledge gained tonight. For me, going for a CT is no different than
any other person going to the doctor for a regular blood pressure screening. It's just what I am accustomed to doing.
I wasn't allowed food or water for four hours previous to the test, which is a stretch for me. I'm used to "grazing" and
without it, my blood sugar drops too low. I had to register through the ER, then walk over to the radiology department. I was hoping
it would start on time, so I could eat something immediately afterwards. As it turned out, there were two emergency procedures
and I was taken back about an hour late, even though I sat entirely alone in an almost dark waiting room.
I've had more CT scans than I can count over the past seven years. As soon as I entered the room, I realized we had a new
CT machine, even since my last test at the end of April. I asked about it, and found out it's the new 64 slice CT scanner.
It's the most advanced technology, and I am thankful that even though I live in a very small town, this hospital always has
the best equipment available.
As always, nothing is easy with me medically. It's the big joke with me, my family and friends. (Kelle, you laughingly call me
high maintenance, but I can't help it!) From the port-a-cath breaking and going into my heart, to being almost impossible to
gain access to a vein, if it can go wrong, chances are I will experience it. Tonight was no exception, and two different
nurses had to try multiple times to get in a vein for the IV.
The procedure itself was almost identical to the other cat scans I've had. The only exception was an injection of lasix
before we started, to make sure the bladder would be full, to capacity. (I soon discovered they surely meant to capacity!) A few
scans were done without contrast, then it was injected rapidly from the machine (not a manual push), and scans were taken at
ten minute intervals. I then had to lay on my stomach for an additional scan. After a review, she decided to put me back
through again, then the test was over.
The results from this new scanner will create a three dimensional colored image, which can be rotated and reviewed. The
images and clarity produced have resulted in incredibly improved accuracy and diagnosis.
I'll get the results Monday morning.
Today I am grateful for a surprise letter from Abigail.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday October 2, 2007
"Hope is like a road in the country; there was never a road, but when many people walk on it, the road comes into existence."
Some of you were concerned about how I took eleven months of antibiotics without getting answers, or didn't see a urologist
sooner. The primary issue was that the infections manifested themselves in myriad ways in my body. Sometimes it was strep, sometimes in was a kidney infection,
sometimes they showed themselves in other areas of my body...and at times I had multiple bacteria at the same time. There
seemed to be no pattern to what was happening. Toward the end, the infections began to show most often in the kidney or bladder,
even if there was infection elsewhere at the same time. It was at that point that I had the IVP to test for kidney stones.
When it came back negative, quite frankly the doctor basically dismissed me. Testing negative for stones did not
answer the infection issue, and I knew I needed to continue to be proactive and aggressive with my own health care. Another
kidney/bladder infection manifested itself, as I knew it would, and I went to another of my physicians. We tried a couple
different classifications of medications, to no avail, then I made the appointment with the urologist, which my doctor agreed
should be the next step.
Today I am grateful for a family evening outdoors.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday October 1, 2007
October 1, Breast Cancer Awareness Month begins.
October 1, It's my 6 year remission date.
October 1, I'm in the middle of a possible relapse.
What I know for sure is that I am at peace.
I did have my stitches removed from the jaw line biopsy, and the pathology is fine. It was just a small cyst, as was expected.
Today I am grateful for six more years of life.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday September 30, 2007
One of the things you never think you'll have to do is tell your young children you have cancer. The first time I was diagnosed, Abigail
was just too young, and of course Hannah was born in the midst of treatment. We told them after I went into remission, and even
then, of course, they were too young to understand. Now cancer is a word used casually in our home, when it does come up.
I had decided it was not necessary to say anything to the girls yet. The diagnosis is probable, but it is not confirmed.
This morning I realized it would be discussed in Church and there would be special prayer. I called them into the living room
and they snuggled beside me. At ages nine and six, we were in a different scenario this time.
"Remember how I had cancer before, right here?" (I put my hand on my chest)
They both nodded.
"Well, sometimes cancer comes back. The doctor told me he thinks I have it again, but I have to get another test
done to find out for sure."
I looked into their eyes, especially Abigail's, to see if there was any fear. There was none.
"So today, in Sunday School, you might want to make a prayer request..."
Before I could finish, Hannah interjected-- "To pray that you don't have cancer again."
"That's right!" I smiled and within minutes they were back in their rooms getting ready. My heart is light, I'm thankful
that they are believers...we are a family of faith.
This conversation could have been more difficult, but the reality of my life, for as long as they can remember, is
cancer, tests, and medicines. It's all they know. It's their "normal". None of it causes them fear. We've always taken a
casual approach to my health, and never burdened them with all of the details. Both girls have been to chemotherapy with me.
We all laugh about when I was bald. The most they've heard me say is "Mommy doesn't feel well", or in the times I have missed
Church, and they have asked if I am going, I answer "I just took my medicine, we'll see." That's good enough for them.
In that way, I am blessed.
I am also blessed that they are young...and innocent. Hannah was still in my womb and Abigail was only two and a half
the first time I was diagnosed. They don't understand mortality issues related to cancer. In reality, I have never associated
cancer with my death. Not for me. I do not believe cancer will ever take my life.
In the end, the fact remains that there is not a definitive diagnosis. And our prayer today was that there be no cancer.
Today I am grateful for childhood innocence.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday September 29, 2007
Things have calmed some, now that "the news" has had some time to settle with those around me. I know it was tough to hear,
and it takes a little while to adjust. I'm still feeling very optimistic.
Today I am grateful for a card from "my other Mom & Dad".
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday September 28, 2007
"Think positively and masterfully, with confidence and faith, and life becomes more secure, more fraught with action, richer
in achievement and experience."
Today I am grateful for the first red leaves of fall.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday September 27, 2007
Hannah-ism: Hannah sneaked up behind the couch and frightened me.
Me: "Hannah, you scared me to death! Don't do that, honey."
Hannah: "That was funny!"
Me: (laughing) "You don't want to scare me dead, do you?"
Hannah: "You don't really die when you get scared to death, Mommy."
Me: "Are you sure?" (still laughing)
Hannah: "Mommy, just say boo and watch what happens."
Me: "BOO!"
Hannah: (jumping and pretending to be startled) "You scared me to death! And see? I'm not dead!"
Today I am grateful for laughter and fall breezes.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday September 26, 2007
Today was test result day, 9:30am. As I was called back into the office to speak with a nurse first, an exam room door opened
and an elderly man exited. I could feel it in the air. His eyes were red, his face solemn. Few words were exchanged beyond
that point. The doctor shook his hand--everything was so serious, and too quiet. As he left the room, my heart was heavy.
I felt certain he had just been told he had cancer.
Soon, it was my turn. Dr. Bender entered the room, and as I suspected, the additional test request was because of the
results from two weeks ago. There was not a lot of small talk as he opened my chart and pulled the paper out. He began to speak
carefully, slowly, calmly. "The FISH test came back positive." He paused. As he began to speak, I could tell he was choosing
his words carefully. "Positive indicates the presence of abnormal growth (pause) possible tumor activity (pause)..." I filled
in the blank for him. "Cancer." "Yes", he said. He began to explain that it was 95% accurate, but not a definite diagnosis. He has
seen someone get a positive FISH but have no cancer. I spoke up to let him know that I don't panic with news like this. I've
had so much done to me since my original diagnosis, I am pretty calm about things. He nodded his head and said "Good."
We spoke further. Basically, this test says I have bladder cancer. He had reviewed my former cat scan from April again, and with another physician, who
both agreed on how to proceed. The next step is to have a CT IVP. This will show whether the abnormalities or tumors have spread
into the ureters and kidneys. I have that test next week, on Wednesday. I will have no results that day, but go for them on
October 8. I believe one of two things will happen on that date:
1. The CT confirms the cancer and then I have a scope to determine if it is invasive, etc.
2. The CT doesn't pick anything up, perhaps because we have caught it very early, making the CT results inconclusive until I have the
scope scheduled and completed. The scope lets him put me to sleep, biopsy the bladder, and get a good look at everything.
I have no fear. I actually feel relief. I've had the worst year of my life physically-- Eleven antibiotics in eleven months. I've searched for
answers for way too long. It looks like I am about to get my answer. My prayer is that there is no cancer. It wouldn't be the
first time the Lord has saved me from another diagnosis when tests indicated I had relapsed.
If it is meant for me to have cancer, then I can't help but think this first thought...THANK THE LORD for a year of infection,
otherwise the cancer would not have been found in its early stages. I would have never gone to a urologist. I show no "official"
signs of cancer. I do not believe I have any advanced disease....and there is no need to entertain that thought at this stage.
The most difficult part of this day was not in hearing the news. The hardest part was telling Dad I needed to talk to him and silently walking
into my living room....and walking over to their house to sit and tell Mom...and waiting the few minutes for lunch time to look Frank in the
eyes and tell him.
I'm in a good place right now. I'm calm. Everything will be all right. I've learned to trust God. He has proven time after time that
He knows more than I do.
Although I feel no fear, if you think I didn't look just a little deeper into my two girls' eyes after school today, you'd be
wrong.
Today I am grateful for the feeling of relief.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday September 25, 2007
Even though this is a tough time for me medically, I cannot ignore the positive changes that have also happened.
At last my posture has been corrected, and although certain muscles are still very tight, the pain in my neck and shoulder
blades has diminished considerably. (I do attend therapy once a week now)
The iontophoresis seems to have been effective on the elbow. It has been a long time since I went to pick something up
and dropped it. My handwriting and control is difficult at times, but I don't have daily pain in my arm. Behavior modification
and awareness on how much I use my arm continues to help.
The neuropathy has not flared as often as in the past. My left leg and arm do still go "dead", but no longer daily.
These improvements help me deal with the present situation much better. I now deal primarily with the fibromyalgia and the
quest for the source of repeated infection, and everything else is secondary.
Today I am grateful for "catching a break".
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday September 24, 2007
A few weeks ago I discovered a place on the back of my jaw line. Today, it was biopsied.
Thirty minutes and a few stitches later, I was out the door. The doctor believes it was a cyst, but it has been sent for pathology, and I'll
get the results next week when the stitches are removed. It's nothing I'm worried about, I just knew it needed to be checked.
In other medical news, I am supposed to see Dr. Bender Wednesday to get my test results from two weeks ago. For some reason
his office called today and wants me to have another CT scan and IVP. (This is in addition to the plan we had in place at my first appointment.)
Both of these procedures were just done within the last few months, and she could not tell me why he wanted to repeat them.
I do know he reviewed the original tests, because I was there when he pulled them up. I will find out more on
Wednesday when I meet with him. I imagine there was something in these last results that has caused him to re-evaluate. That
also means we may have some answers.
Although I am glad I do not have strep, this virus is wearing me down. It doesn't seem to want to leave yet. As of late,
my time seems to revolve around medical appointments. But it's this that
keeps me smiling. They had just finished playing their first games of the season on Saturday. See Hannah's dirty face? And
ever the model, Abigail "poses" with a bag of goldfish snacks.
Today I am grateful for surprises in the mail.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday September 23, 2007
Fall is here! My favorite season. Now if only the temperatures would drop just a bit. We're facing record
highs for the next two days.
"If winter is slumber and spring is birth, and summer is life, then autumn rounds out to be reflection. It's a time of year when the leaves are down and the harvest is in and
the perennials are gone. Mother Earth just closed up the drapes on another year and it's time to reflect on what's come before."
Today I am grateful for soccer girls.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday September 22, 2007
"Your present circumstances don’t determine where you can go; they merely determine where you start."
Today I am grateful for hand prints in concrete.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday September 21, 2007
I made it twelve days off of antibiotics--and now I am sick again. I've had a sinus headache for days and a sore throat that
started yesterday. It got progressively worse, and after seeing a blister in my throat this morning, I decided to go on to
the doctor. Since it is Friday, I didn't want to take a chance going through the weekend.
Thankfully, the quick test for strep came back negative. I may have something viral this time. There's already talk of
me having my tonsils removed, but until there's a firm plan in place, I'd rather not speculate on the "what ifs".
Today I am grateful for free flowing prose.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday September 20, 2007
"When you come to the edge of all the light you know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing one
of two things will happen: there will be something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly."
Today I am grateful for a little extra sleep.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday September 19, 2007
I checked the girls out of school this afternoon so they could go with me to take Kelle to the airport.
Although it was sad to see her leave us, my heart was full of joy watching the girls cling to her with hugs and kisses.
And without doubt, she feels the same way about them.
Today I am grateful for easy conversations.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday September 18, 2007
"I have always believed that whatever good or bad fortune may come our way we can always give it meaning and transform
it into something of value."
Today I am grateful for true gentlemen.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday September 17, 2007
Since this is a milestone year for our Church, we are having morning and evening services through Thursday.
Various preachers and evangelists are called from the floor. The services have been amazing so far, and I am thrilled
to have Kelle by my side.
Hannah-ism: The girls and I have always played a game when I am cold. I would grab them and put my hand
on their stomachs to get warm. Hannah started telling me to use her arm pit, because it was even warmer.
Hannah: (she reached over and touched my hand in Church last night) "You are cold!"
Me: "I know. My hands are freezing."
Hannah: (whispering in my ear) "You need to get a little armpit when we go home."
Today I am grateful for using Mom-maw's Bible today.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday September 16, 2007
We had a wonderful Homecoming service today. I was able to dedicate this song to Dad:
Special thanks to Ken Asbury who obliged my request and sang.
"Thank You"
I dreamed I went to heaven
And you were there with me
We walked upon the streets of gold
Beside the crystal sea
We heard these angels singing
Then someone called your name
You turned and saw this young man
And he was smiling as he came
And he said friend you may not know me now
And then he said, but wait
You used to teach my Sunday School
When I was only eight
And every week you would say a prayer
Before the class would start
And one day when you said that prayer
I asked Jesus in my heart
CHORUS
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am a life that was changed
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am so glad you gave
Then another man stood before you
And said remember the time
A missionary came to your church
And his pictures made you cry
You didn’t have much money
But you gave it anyway
Jesus took the gift you gave
And that’s why I’m heaven today
CHORUS (repeat)
One by one they came
Far as your eyes could see
Each life somehow touched
By your generosity
Little things that you had done
Sacrifices you made
They were unnoticed on the earth
In heaven now proclaimed
And I know that up in heaven
You’re not supposed to cry
But I am almost sure
There were tears in your eyes
As Jesus took your hand
And you stood before the Lord
He said, my child look around you
For great is your reward
CHORUS (repeat)
I am so glad you gave.
Today I am grateful for 30 years in the ministry.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday September 15, 2007
Tonight was our Homecoming meal and Pastor Appreciation night. Dad is celebrating 30 years as Pastor at our
Church. I picked up Kelle at the airport today, and we were able to surprise my Dad with her. We sneaked to his house and
waited in the living room, and when he came downstairs she was sitting waiting for him. He was so happy to see her, and I am
thrilled she made the trip down to share this very special celebration with our family and our Church.
Today I am grateful for successful surprises.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday September 14, 2007
I hope you have enjoyed and perhaps even found inspiration in our 45 Day series called "The Spirit of Hope". This
is our concluding thought:
The Spirit of Hope:
"All you've got is all you can give and that will always be enough."
Today I am grateful for very special family surprises.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday September 13, 2007
It's soccer season! Both girl's coaches have called. Hannah is on the Sting Rays and Abigail is playing for The Crew. Both are still
co-ed teams. Abigail had her first practice tonight and was all smiles. Of the three sports they each play, soccer is my favorite.
The Spirit of Hope:
"No one knows the challenge better than you. Advice is fine, but trust your own instincts, follow your heart. And keep on
keeping on, little by little, one day at a time."
Today I am grateful for a cat who begs to play fetch.
Thank you God, for another day.
Wednesday September 12, 2007
My first appointment with the new doctor went well. Although I have no definitive answers yet (just a few possibilities),
I had a scan completed and lab work that is currently being processed. We must have those answers before we proceed--and I
return in two weeks for the results. He's running some tests that have not been done to date. I have two additional procedures
tentatively scheduled, one of which I will need to be put to sleep to complete. I am comfortable that at last there is a
plan in place.
The Spirit of Hope:
"Deep inside us, we have a spirit of energy and determination, a spirit that refuses to be broken--and we call this hope.
Even when life's challenges overwhelm us our hope inspires us to rise to new heights."
Today I am grateful for fall temperatures.
Thank you God, for another day.
Tuesday September 11, 2007
Six years.
Never the same.
Forever changed.
The Spirit of Hope:
"Adversity rewrites the stories of our lives, changes the cast of characters, and alters what we expected would happen. Yet the stories go on and some day,
behind the scenes, we'll find the true importance of their twists and turns."
Today I am grateful for rain.
Thank you God, for another day.
Monday September 10, 2007
I received official confirmation of our $6,365.44 team total from the ACS office.
click here to view
If your browser resizes the image, right-click to save to your desktop, then view full size.
Here's a shot of the back of the Relay for Life shirts...every participant received a shirt, and we were proud to be a sponsor
for this year's event!
click here to view
For our Crew, we had this sleeve imprint done.
The Spirit of Hope:
"Even a well-planned journey can have a rough road now and then...but somewhere down that road there's a smooth lake."
Today I am grateful for a "stay at home" day.
Thank you God, for another day.
Sunday September 9, 2007
Ten days, twenty pills. I finished the medicine tonight. The nausea worsened each day and I'm glad I don't have to take
any tomorrow. Wednesday I'll meet with the specialist and go from there.
The Spirit of Hope:
"You never know how far you can go until you envision a distant destination and take the first steps."
Today I am grateful for telephone laughter and first time meetings.
Thank you God, for another day.
Saturday September 8, 2007
Frank and the girls left this afternoon to visit his mother. Armed with presents and homemade Grandparents Day cards,
they were off and running. (Adding to the excitement, Hannah lost tooth number two today!) When they called from her house,
they were so excited they were talking nonstop. Grandma bought them bears and they had been playing with Shadow, her dog.
It's quiet here---just me and the cats.
The Spirit of Hope:
"Dreams come true one step at a time."
Today I am grateful for an orderly kitchen.
Thank you God, for another day.
Friday September 7, 2007
"The human heart feels things the eyes cannot see, and knows what the mind cannot understand."
The Spirit of Hope:
"Horizons are made for going beyond."
Today I am grateful for afternoon hugs.
Thank you God, for another day.
Thursday September 6, 2007
Every three minutes, someone in the United States is diagnosed with breast cancer.
Every THREE minutes.
EVERY THREE MINUTES.
Please |
